Devilled chicken recipe by Magic Kitty
Ingredients:
– Chicken
– A human who cooks it
– Strong nails
– A safe place to escape and hide
Directions:
1) Randomly smell what is cooking in the pot: it is Chicken.
2) Wait until it starts smelling burnt.
3) Alert the human with desperate meows: the human in this case usually wakes up from his state of computer narcosis and runs to turn off the stove and remove the lid from the pot, smoking the house.
4) Wait hanging around until the cook goes back to the computer to finish writing the emails, while (he believes) the chicken cools down.
5) Jump silently but blindly on the stove. This phase requires a certain amount of bravery and a certain capacity to bounce back in the event of an emergency.
Important: if the landing went well, it would be better not to leave black paw prints on the hob, because in case of investigations it would end up being easy suspects.
6) Take the chicken out of the hot pan with the nails and throw it on the floor, possibly under a cupboard. Quickly maul it, even if it is a bit tongue-burning.
7) Go back to sleep in the same position as before.
Possible recipe variations:
a) The absent-minded human will believe he has eaten the chicken and will return to the PC. In this case, continue to sleep for another ten minutes and then meow to get your regular dinner.
b) The human slips in the wake of grease left by the Chicken, beats the head on the ground and faints. In this case, meow until help arrives. After that, the human is unlikely to remember the chicken.
c) The human discovers the empty pot and the pawprints. In this case he usually calls the police: you can understand it by the siren-like-sound of his screaming. Run fast to a safe place for at least a couple of hours and then come back purring in the most affectionate way.
Read the original post in Italian
